If you haven’t yet noticed, one of the tabs on my site, Commas and Cotton Candy, is Long Distance Relationships. I have had my fair share of experiences when it comes to LDRs and it’s also an integral part of who I am but before I start writing posts about it, I wanted to share my personal experience with LDRs.
I’ve been in a long distance relationship as long as I can remember. My grandparents live in Fukuoka and I lived overseas for my whole childhood. I would see them twice a year for a few weeks at a time when we would go back to visit over summer and winter vacation.
I have only made 4 major moves in my life (early 20’s), but having attended an international school, I faced many a heartbreak as I had friends going in and out of my life for all of middle school and high school. While friends moving away is always painful, one memory from sophomore year really sticks out: Gabs told me over lunch that she was moving to Australia and I was absolutely heartbroken. We sobbed all through lunch and we couldn’t stop crying and ended up missing our math quiz (lol sorry Mr. B).
After graduating high school, my friends were dispersed across the globe. In my junior year, I met a guy from Spain while I was back home in Hong Kong for the summer and we started dating. The rest, as they say, is history (history = 4 years of long distance and counting).
I know about the shock when you first hear the news, the heartbreak in preparing for it, the struggle of trying to “make the most of the time we have now”, how desperately you try to frequently Skype. I also know the joy of realizing you’ll reunite again, counting down the days, the first hug, resuming conversations as if nothing has changed and reminiscing on the good old days. The absolute bliss when they visit you and you can share your city with them. I know the heartbreak of having to say goodbye at the airport. If you hug them tight enough, if you clutch their hand long enough, maybe somehow time will stop and you won’t have to say goodbye?
While LDRs are incredibly painful, I have learnt to see the beauty of them. Simply the fact that your relationship and your love can withstand thousands of miles, whether you had a choice in this distance or not, I find beautiful. More than anything, I have learned from them; about myself, about others, about communication and about love.
My current LDR status: I live in Tokyo. My grandparents live in Fukuoka. My sister lives in Canada. My boyfriend lives in Hong Kong. My (best) friends are scattered around the world from Hong Kong to Australia to Singapore to Chicago to Vancouver to Thailand.
Stay tuned as I share my experiences and stories with LD, interviews with people in various LDRs, advice and more! (If there are topics you specifically want to read about, please write it in the comment sections below)
*Disclaimer: I am not claiming to be a LDR expert. I know many people experience LDRs in different ways, I will simply be sharing my own experiences with it and the lessons that have come out of it.